My previous post involved Robert Pattinson so it’s only fair that the next one include Kristen Stewart. I guess that’s not really fair, it’s more annoying. Like her face. What is with her face? Why does she only have one face? I mean, most people can at least be called two-faced but not Kristen. Also, she has no emotions. I don’t believe in feelings, feelings are gross. That being said, there is a difference between having feelings and having the ability to make alternative facial expressions.
Every thing that she does and says is in the same, droll, boring voice. I’d say she’s too serious but that would probably open the floor to too many “Sirius” related jokes. I imagine that if she were cast in a Harry Potter movie she’d been Professor Binns. She’d show up & do the same freaking thing every day while boring everyone to death. Maybe it’s a “dead people” thing. Perhaps she’s taking her role as a vampire too seriously. Her facial expressions are so deadened that maybe she is a vampire. Someone should probably test some garlick and a stake on her just to be sure. Thankfully she was cast in Twilight which doesn’t require any kind of talent or skill. Someone really needs to teach people that being “deep” doesn’t require the same facial expressions that a comatose person would use. She just has to run around a lot and whine that too many boys like her. On the other hand, we have Emma Watson who runs around with model hair proving once again that she is in no way Hermione Granger. Anyway, AKYL Kristen Stewart because at least maybe then your expression would change.
Thanks to Caren for the submission. If you have an AKYL you’d like to submit email it at email@example.com. If you don’t, work on having a more interesting life.